My husband makes a point to include Zach when he makes repairs. If Zach's bike breaks, he shows him how to fix it. He always provides an opportunity for our son to be part of the solution. Even if it's to simply identify and hand him a tool. I've been paying close attention, and I see the role this plays in building a young boys confidence. Couple that with the  teaching of the word of God, and you witness the making of a man.  

Sadly, my two older sons were not provided with similar experiences during their formative years. Their biological father had little influence over them, and Michael and I were still very dysfunctional. But here's the good news. There is a reason we also call the Savior, Redeemer.

Jesus Redeems. Michael now takes advantage of every opportunity to allow our sons to be strong and effective. We've made many mistakes in the past, but we're forgiven, and God continues to give us new opportunities to be godly parents. So don't let the enemy convince you that all is lost if you have regrets about the way you've raised your children. You can be effective today.

Ask yourself:

Do I recognize teachable moments and take the time to teach my son? Or do I do everything for him because I either want it done "my" way, or I'm too busy to teach him.

* Take the time to build the relationship and watch a young boy's confidence level rise.

Never do something for your child that will deprive him of strength and effectiveness. The very definition of emasculate.

Will you ask God if there are any areas where you have unknowingly emasculated your son(s)?

For many years, I was too broken to know what my sons needed. I was just trying to get through each day, and I was convinced that doing most of the household chores somehow made my life run smoother. It gave me a sense of control, the one thing I desired during a childhood filled with abuse.  Meanwhile, my sons were missing opportunities to develop their confidence.

No guilt. This blog is not  meant to overwhelm you. It's meant to empower you. If you happen to be a survivor, it's one of the best gifts you can give yourself and your children; strength and effectiveness. Give them what you may have been robbed of as a child and you will witness the breaking of a generational curse and gain more ground on your journey to healing.

"There is therefore no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit." (Roman 8:1 NKJV)