Love is patient and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13:4-8 NJKV)

And there we have it...Divine instruction on how to not hurt someone. And with it of course, the hope of how the love of God will un-hurt a heart broken by the careless sin of another, (this is no time to be judgemental, we've all operated on both sides of that fence).  

Michael and I recently committed to reading that Scripture once a day, while alone in our quiet time, and then together before we go to sleep; for twenty-one days. And it's transforming the way we communicate to one another.

Now, if I'm rude, I immediately feel a check in my spirit and apologize. I've never been so aware of what love is and what love isn't. I've taken the time to memorize those verses and I'm convinced that all Christians should make an effort to at least memorize the verses that they struggle with most often. The word of God is medicine.

Verses 11 and 12 reveal a deeper meaning to me:

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child,; but when I became a man, I put away childish things. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known.

We all have perceptions of ourselves in relationships, be it marriage, parenthood, friendship, or acquaintances. I have ideas of the kind of wife I am to my husband, but God has revealed to me that it's not my perception that matters--it's my husband's. In other words, not how I see myself, but how I am known.

How the people in our lives know us is inversely proportional to how affective we are in loving them God's way. If we want to see a real reflection of ourselves, then the word of God must be our mirror. If we do not spend time in His word, we see dimly.

Will you consider reading the thirteenth chapter of 1 Corinthians everyday for twenty one days? A great exercise before you get started is to first describe how you see yourself in a particular relationship and then ask that person to describe how they see you. Write it all down, allow 1 Corinthians to sift through both views and reveal the truth. (I know, I know, but this is how we grow up!)

Happy New Year! Happy New You! This is the love that heals.

*An Addendum

There are times when no matter how committed we are, some will only have a negative view. It's unavoidable, we can't please everybody all the time, but we can love God's way, and leave outcomes where they belong; in His hands.